L’autre Côté du Miroir

my head is empty. i slept perhaps 3 hours last night, which was my own fault of course... the workday lasted forever and then i got really pissed off, someone got on my nerve, and was pushing me. i felt like saying fuck off but of course i didn't. i was all normal and said something else and hit my head to the wall while saying it.

i always behave a certain way in this certain situation and it annoys me, i can see those situations coming from far away and i know exactly how its going to end. well, its nothing that kills me, maybe i'll learn some discipline from this or something... because the consequences of what i say are annoying and long lasting.

i am tired and dont want to do anything when i have a zillion things to do. aaaaaanyway. i think im a bit stressed. this afternoon i broke into a helpless cry when the phone rang as i didnt want to answer it. clearly thats when i knew i need a sedative and maybe therapy too, but now, thanks to not going to work, i feel much better. now im totally exhausted. long day need to sleep.